i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize