so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
it was like eating out sand paper
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
