No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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