I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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