His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
