White coat. Heels.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize