non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
