your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
nutella sex= disaster
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
