he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
