If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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