he told me I talked like a deaf person
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
