But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
