Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
