worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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