if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
