Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I wish i was in the wii world.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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