lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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