god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
