Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
