Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
