now i know why i became what i already was.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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