Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
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