Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
