she looked like the bat from fern gully.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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