jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
