therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Randomize
