Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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