Don't make out with my wife yet
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
