if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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