She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
