ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
