so explain again why im purple
no
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Randomize
