Swine flu. Run for my life!
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
