Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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