some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
