i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Did I show you my penis last night?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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