I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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