this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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