would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
