is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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