is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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