it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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