Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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