Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
