you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
