Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
