Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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