is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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