Whod you bang
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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