Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
