can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
home. puking in laundry basket.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
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